Tuesday, September 18, 2012

Out of Balance

By Julie Rahm                                  
Balance is normally defined as a state of equilibrium or equipoise; equal distribution of weight or amount. Sometimes balance refers to mental steadiness or emotional stability; the habit of calm behavior and judgment. Or, balance can be a state of body equilibrium. For example, he lost his balance and fell down.
When my husband John flew fighters in the Marine Corps, his jet needed to be in balance in order to fly. Lift produced by the wings needed to balance the weight of the jet. And, the thrust produced by the engine needed to balance the drag produced by the forward motion. There are examples of balance throughout both our man-made and natural worlds. However, even more interesting than balance is out of balance.
When things are out of balance, change occurs. A large part of my personal coaching business is generated by out of balance conditions. Clients come to me because their workplace is unbalanced. Or, their relationships are not balanced. Even business transactions can be out of balance. As an example, lending practices have become quite painful for borrowers. Banks are dragging borrowers through broken glass in order to get financing. Tropical rain forest trees are falling by the millions in order to satisfy the paperwork requirements levied by lenders. Lending transactions are lopsided and consequently feel awful to the borrowers. The banks intrude into every aspect of their personal lives in order to qualify the borrowers. And, the borrowers don’t know anything about the lives of the loan officer and underwriter sitting in judgment. Respect has taken a back seat to the banks appetite for financial discovery. As a result, not enough lending is taking place. When the economy was booming, banks should have curbed their lending; but they didn’t. They loaned money to everyone without a lot of regard. Now that the economy is slow and lending restrictions should be eased, banks have made borrowing really hard. My point is that some of my coaching business is generated by the angst caused by my clients attempting to get business loans. Sad but true!
In personal relationships, imbalance is easy to spot. Imbalance in relationships manifests as resentment. There are many examples. Common is when one partner works full time, takes care of the kids and does the bulk of the household chores, while the other works and does not help at home. Another example is when the breadwinner is working two jobs to make ends meet and the partner’s career is watching television at home. The imbalance is a recipe for resentment. The good news, balance is easily restored and resentment is easily remedied.
Words matter. And, nothing restores balance like words of understanding. Words of understanding carry a lot of weight and can re-balance the relationship. Mix in some compassion, and the words of understanding can have a medicinal affect that alleviates festering resentment. Are your relationships balanced?
Want to learn more? Contact me by visiting my website at www.AmericasMindsetMechanic.com. 

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